Woman with facial mask in the bathroom

Two thirds of mothers lose their identity when they become a parent; makeup and skincare can help

1st April 2023 | Author: Victoria Woollaston-Webber

A study has found that 62% of Mums feel like they’ve lost their identity since giving birth, while a second study found that this can be improved by indulging more in self-care, including buying skincare and makeup

When we had our son the thing we struggled with most – outside of the sleepless nights – was a loss of identity. We no longer felt like ourselves and didn’t know who we were outside of being a mother. That was when we discovered solace in makeup and skincare.

Not only did applying makeup or spending time looking after our skin and hair allow us to participate in self-care, and take time out for ourselves, it reminded us who we were before our baby was born and was something we found a real passion for.


A recent survey found that participating regularly in a form of self-care can

  • Enhance self-confidence (64%)
  • Increase productivity (67%)
  • Increase happiness (71%)

It has even been shown to reduce heart disease, stroke, and cancer risk.

Source: Vagaro

After speaking to friends, colleagues, fellow Mums, and family members, we realised this was a common complaint.

And now a study from the online motherhood community, Peanut with Tommee Tippee has revealed just how widespread the issue is.

After surveying 2,000 British mothers, 62% admitted they feel like they have lost part of their identity, 40% feel less confident since giving birth, while 63% said they often feel like they are comparing themselves to other mothers on social media or in real life.

A third of the women surveyed (37%) said that they worked full-time, while 34% looked after their children full-time, and 28% worked part-time.

This loss of identity and confidence – and the need to juggle everything – was, and still is, the entire inspiration behind mamabella.

We launched the site to help women feel empowered. A safe space where they could feel seen thanks to approachable, friendly, and accessible articles aimed at anyone who is short on time, short on money, and who doesn’t feel themselves.

In response to the survey results, Peanut has launched a group called “Just Winging It”.

It comes after Peanut and Tommee Tippee launched their brand platform #TheTruthIs, which is shedding a light on the often-contradictory truths around parenting.

As the pair explained, “this group provides safe, non-judgemental space for you to talk about all the moments where you’re just winging it because you’re not alone.”

The importance of self-care stats Vagaro

From our personal experience, looking after your skin, taking time out to experiment with makeup, or simply having a long bath boosted both our sense of identity and confidence.

This follows a study of 2,000 men and women commissioned by money.co.uk which found that buying perfume, and nail polish both increased happiness by 59%. Buying lipstick made the participants feel 54% happier, while skincare purchases made people 52% happier.

The results were based on the Brief Mood Introspection Scale (BMIS) which is a scale that analyses people’s moods. They asked each person to record the intensity of 10 different emotions before making an online purchase. They then repeated this after payment had been made.

Based on these findings, the study also discovered that buying an eyeshadow palette increased happiness by as much as 62%.

“When you compare yourself, you are adhering to somebody else’s standards, under their circumstances. When you do what’s best for you, you can take control on your own terms on how you want to do things,” said Peanut’s founder Michelle Kennedy.

Getting started with self-care

With this in mind, we’ve pulled together what we believe are good starting points when looking to make self-care a more permanent change. We’re also here if you ever need to chat or ask questions that you don’t feel comfortable asking friends or colleagues. Please lean on us – we’re in this together!

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